talk about being addicted. it's three in the effing morning and i am just compelled to get up and blog. "blog what?", you ask. i haven't the slightest idea! i know. i'm insane. i don't refute that. i must have ADHD or something. nowadays, i can't seem to concentrate on one single task. which is putting my job in danger. okay.
when my demons woke me up in the middle of the night (actually, that was my mom's doing. she left for home.) and disturbed my peaceful slumber, i couldn't quite get back to sleep. somewhere along the lines of couting sheep, i saw steven gerrard's face and just couldn't get him out of my head. "i MUST blog about him," psychotic me said. hmmm, maybe i shouldn't have had that last dose of getty images of him running all over the field looking all commanding and all that. there are some crushes that you get over, there are some that you just won't admit to yourself much less anybody else, but there are some that you can't get enough of. this is what those stalkers must feel like. although i am amateur compared to some of my friend's stalking skills. it must be one of those childhood crush thingies. because i ALWAYS have a huge grin when talking about him. and sometimes, i even dream about him. not that there's anything wrong in dreaming, its's just taking up waaay too much of my time. okay, i must end this stupid rave just so there seems to be an ending.
uhmm..steven gerrard is engaged/married and has a kid with alex curran. she is the typical footballer's wife, i guess. think poor man's mrs.beckham but not bad looking. they have a beautiful daughter named lilly-ella. they couldn't decide on a name so they joined their two favorites. he proposed to alex the day after their baby was born. he tucked the ring among the folds of the baby blanket that she was wrapped in. that proposal wanted me to be on the receiving end of it. *sigh* but i am a committment phobic. i can't stick to a shampoo, sport, or diet. (thank god i can stick to one man! haha.) it's just romantic is all. enough about the boyish skipper, i'll just post a pic just to satisfy myself.
oddly enough, after that stevie rave i can't remember what was bothering me a couple of minutes ago. haha. but i remember wanting to put up a wishlist. that's gonna be a loooong one. maybe if i was really a good little girl i might get something other than coals this christmas.
1. iBook. it's gorgeous. i want one.
2. n91. just because i need a new phone.
3. a car. i don't care which model/make. just a car, damnit!
4. books!!! and not the ones from ages ago. all brand spanking new ones.
5. internet connection at home. yeah, i know. i'm so behind the times.
6. havaianas or dupes. i'm in love with slippers at the moment.
7. wifi for my iBook. ha.
8. a tv DECENT for my living room.
9. makeover for my house. i just want to come home and find it all cool and decked out. i mean, it's got to have my taste and all but really, i think i'll go mad going through fabrics.
10. trip back to ny. (this is a formal plea to the us immigration officers.)
11. anti-wrinkle cream. i'm not that old but my job sure makes me feel like a workhorse.
12. kick-ass DVD collection. it's so hard living in conjugal ownership.
13. liverpool home shirt. i'm looking all over the place for a fake one. loser.
14. a microwave oven.
15. a HUGE jar full of gummi bears!
16. a less easily agitated boyfriend. is there some camp that i can send him off to? ha. which makes me jump into my other issue. <-- (my friend said that this was such an american expression. i don't get it.)
we went to an amusement park over the second long weekend. needless to say, it was a battle and a half just getting there. he bitched and moaned the whole time, determined to prove to me that riding things that make your stomach turn inside out was a dumb idea. kinda sad that not all men are into that adrenalin rush thing. not that i am but i just want to be able to say, "yeah. i rode on that one and it was awesome!" it wasn't enough that the morning started horribly (his parents wanted to use the car to switch the radio with the other one), he had to be insane driving (paranoid of all the exits being a highway vigin driver), and we had to have the worst of luck looking for an ATM machine that worked. i was ready to forego the 50bucks extra charge but there wasn't a functioning maching in sight! talk about the frustration and fights that we got into that morning alone!
although he had a fairly good time in the amusement park, the dive home was worse. he has the worse luck and shortest temper in driving. who doesn't when traffic is insane and could last up to five hours. all in all it was a great day to just be out for a change. but it was too much work. just coaxing him not to be afraid of a kiddie ride was too much effort for me. i was this close to strangling him. in fairness, he did warn me he'd never get on one of those things and i should be grateful that he tried to just for me. but i can safely say that it's never happening again. it was just awful for me. to be paranoid all the time and to have my guard up. and to be verbally abused the whole trip! i guess that's what gets to me. he's terrible when he's mad. i wish there was someone i could bribe for him not to get irritable. did he really think that i was going to have a good time running around the park after what he made me go through? i don't work that way. and i might seem to brush it off so quickly just because he's there. that's probably one of the other things that i hate. i'd rather get into a fist fight with him than talk it out. because for him there isn't "talking it out". it's just yelling and screaming. sometimes i get tired of baby-sitting a egotistical brat.
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